dumb is what makes Sora go round
by philippa1229
Summary: sora is being stupid. Lot's of cursing, most probably there will be yaoi(maybe). this is the first story i was satisfied with so please review to make it better. thank you people who will read this
1. like a sugar rush

"RIKU! RIKU! RIKU! RIKU! RIKU! RIKU! RIKU! RIKU! RIKU! RIKU! RIKU!"

"Yes Sora, what do you want?"

"RIKU, TOMORROW'S MY B-DAY AND I WANT YOU TO BUY ME MAKE UP!"

"WTF Sora! Your birth day was 5 months ago and why the heck do you want make up!"

"Because Vanitas said that all the cool guys wear make up!"

"And you believed him!"

"Yeah, why?"

"Because… forget it. You are to dumb to understand anyway."

"HEY! What's that suppose to mean."

"Just put a sock in it Sora!"

*whines* "Why are you being so mean?" he said in a whiny voice.

*sigh* "Listen if I get you the make up will you leave me alone?"

"YES! YES! YES! YES! YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSSSSSS SSSSSSSS!"

"Fine, then I'll get you the make up." He mumbled to himself. "I can't believe I'm friends with such an idiotic kid."

* * *

After Riku left I was starting to get bored so I decided to play with/annoy my brother Roxas. I went upstairs to his room, when I got there I stared at the millions of posters in his room (I'm not exaggerating … well maybe I am) I couldn't see the wall in his room but I was pretty sure it was blue. I found Roxas sitting on his bed reading comics (he has a whole book shelf of those things). He didn't seem to notice me or was he just trying to ignore me? I can't tell.

"ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS! ROXAS!ROXAS!" I screamed.

"Sora how many times do I have to tell you NOT TO GO INSIDE MY ROOM!? DIDN'T YOU READ THE *beep* SIGN!"

"I DON'T KNOW HOW TO READ!" I said in a cheerful sickening sweet voice.

"SORA GET OUT OMF MY ROOM IF YOU WANT YOUR …HEAD ON YOUR…NECK!" I didn't listen to what he said next but I was sure he said 50 dirty words in one sentence.

"ROXAS YOUR SO MEAN. WHAT DID I EVER DO TO YOU? BESIDES STEAL YOUR PHONE, BURN 100 OF YOUR COMIC BOOKS, PUT SHAVING CREAM IN YOUR HAIR LAST NIGHT, BLOW UP YOUR ROOM, TOLD MY FRIENDS THAT YOU WERE THE IDIOT AND I WAS THE SMART AND COOL ONE IN THE FAMILY, STOLE YOUR BIRTH DAY PRESENTS, SHREDDED ALL YOUR MATH, SCIENCE AND ART HOME WORK AND GAVE AWAY ALL YOUR ACTION FIGURES!"

"YOU DID WHAT?!

"I SAID STEAL YOUR PHONE, BURN 100 OF YOUR COMIC BOOKS, PUT SHAVING CREAM IN YOUR HAIR LAST NIGHT, BLOW UP YOUR ROOM, TOLD MY FRIENDS THAT YOU WERE THE IDIOT AND I WAS THE SMART AND COOL ONE IN THE FAMILY, STOLE YOUR BIRTH DAY PRESENTS, SHREDDED ALL YOUR MATH, SCIENCE AND ART HOME WORK AND GAVE AWAY ALL YOUR ACTION FIGURES!"

"You little insignificant twat!"

"What's insignificant?"

"GET OUT OF MY ROOM!" He pushed me downstairs and ran back to his room.  
"What did I do wrong?"

* * *

Riku returned 30 minutes later with the make up. "Here you go Sora."

"YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY! YAY!"

"I'M GOING HOME Sora if you need me just call,"

"OKAY!" Riku walked away then I realized I didn't have a phone. What will I do if something bad happened? "Noooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" I calmed down and decided it was getting late so I decided to go to bed.

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**I need your reviews to make a better next chapter so please review or else Sora gets lipstick shot up his nose. Thanks for reading updates soon bye!**


	2. laughing stock

**Sorry for taking so long to update. I'm not at the computer so much.**

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I'm walking/skipping to school as happy as… something that's happy. I get to school at 8 a.m. but then the teacher and my classmates started laughing. What's so funny? What did I do? Is there broccoli on my shirt? I don't think there's broccoli on my shirt. Am I wearing pajamas or a clown suit? What the heck is going on? All I did was put on my make up. Is that why there laughing at me? Tears were rolling down my eyes. I ran towards Riku's class room. I opened the door as fast as lightning.

"Young ma…" Everyone was laughing at me again. I started to cry even harder. They started to laugh even harder. Why is the world so cruel? I ran home as fast as a… something that's extremely fast. I was crying for 3 straight hours cause of that whole make up thing (and because Roxas was throwing pillows at me).

"Sora…"

"Go away!"

"Sora, come on. It's me Riku. I'm here to help with this whole thing."

"Were you laughing at me too?"

"No, of course not. You're my best friend. I would never laugh at you."

"Thanks Riku"  
"Your welcome, Now let's get that make up off you."

"So what do we do?"

"Well…" *ring* Riku's phone rang. After Riku checked what it was(which was a split second) He said "oh my gosh Sora, I was suppose to meet up with Kairi. I need to go, why don't you try some hot water. I'll see yah later."

"Okay Riku!"

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**Chapter is short because I decided that maybe I should include what happens next in the next chapter. Sorry.**


	3. what!

**Remember when Riku succumbed to the darkness. Well in this fan fic Sora succumbed to the dumbness.**

* * *

"RIKU! RIKU! RIKU!"

"Yes… SORA! What happened?"

"Well you see I poured extremely hot water on my face and when that didn't work tried nail polish remover and when that didn't work I decided that maybe the water needed to be hotter but there was no fire hot enough so I went to the sun"

"Wait, you did what?"

"I said I poured extremely hot water on my face and when that didn't work tried nail polish remover and when that didn't work I decided that maybe the water needed to be hotter but there was no fire hot enough so I went to the sun"

"How did you not get reduced to ashes?!"

"I don't know. But are you going to help me or not?"

"Fine, stay right there. My mom doesn't want you to get your stupid in our house."

"SURE!

2 hours later (LOL he waited for 2 hours before getting back to him)

"Here you go Sora"

"Thanks Riku!"

So I went back home but forgot how to get there so I went round and round in circles until I finally remembered it was right beside Riku's house ( it took 5 hours to find it)

Anyway when I got to the front door it was locked. I kept banging on it until it was midnight. Finally Roxas opened the door.

"What took you so long?" I asked.

"I didn't want to let you in."

"Why not?" I whined.

"Because it's finally quiet when you are NOT around!"

"Thanks for the compliment!" I said as cheerful as ever. I skipped down the hallway and got to my room. It was as big as a broom closet. My room was pink with lot's of Barbie dolls and tiaras and all those girly stuff. And went to sleep on my bed (with my face still burnt and swollen)


	4. poison

I woke up and went to the bathroom with a very painful feeling on my face. I brushed my teeth and took a shower (correction : my mom gave me a shower) I looked into the bathroom mirror and saw my face all swollen and remembered what Riku gave me a cream to heal my face. I put a layer of cream on my face and went to Riku's house. While walking to Riku's house I started to feel pain. When I looked at his reflection in the water it looked purple and there were green boils on it. Also my skin looked like it was melting.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHH!" I screamed.

I ran to Riku's house as fast as my gay legs could carry me. My face hurt even more when I got there.

"RIKU! ARE YOU THERE?"

"Yes Sora, I'm here… WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR FACE…AGAIN!?"

"I don't know what happened. All I did was put on the cream you gave me."

"WHAT ARE YOU SAYING? I NEVER GAVE YOU ANY CREAM. YOU WENT AWAY BEFORE I COULD GIVE IT TO YOU!"

"Then who gave me this cream?"

"Let me see that."

"Sora, it says "caution contains a very BIG AMOUNT OF POISON."

"Well, how was I supposed to know that?"

"It was in BIG BOLD LETTERS you idiot!"

"I can't read, remember?

"Well damn your reading abilities."

"Back to my face, what do I do?"

"I don't know. Maybe the person who gave it to you will know."

"But it was you who gave it to me."

"For the last time it wasn't me!"

"Well were there other people in your house?"

"Well there was my mom, my sister Sam and Vanitas."(Sam is an OC)

"Wait, why was Vanitas there?"

"Sam invited him over."

"And why have I never met this Sam person before?"

"She hates being with you."

"How will she hate me if she has never met me before?"

"Face it Sora, there are 2 kinds of people in this world. There are smart ones and there is you. So why wouldn't she hate you."

"So I guess there are 2 suspects, there's your mom and you."

"No you idiot. It's either Sam or Vanitas." Riku told me. "*sigh* I was hoping you would keep up a smart conversation."

"I guess you're right."

"Anyway since they're on a trip we are gonna have to investigate next week."

"Why next week?"

"Because that's when they're going back."

"But school starts tomorrow. People are gonna laugh at me."

"Well there's nothing we can do about it then."

"Fine."


	5. We're dead, so beeping dead

1 week later

I was walking towards Riku's house with a paper bag on my head. When I got there Riku was waiting for me.

"Sora, do you know how late you are? I told you to meet me here 6 hours ago! We were supposed to start looking or Sam and Vanitas. How are we supposed to find them now? They could be anywhere by now."

"Or in your kitchen."

"…how the hell did they get there? Sora, when were you smart enough to find that out?"

*shrug*

We approached the two and started asking them questions.

"So… how was the trip?" I asked.

"Okay"

"What did you two do?" Riku asked.

The Vanitas started to blush and Sam started to giggle. Wait, since when did Vani blush?

"They're innocent." I told Riku.

*nod*

"Sora why are you wearing a paper bag on your face?"

"Because you poisoned it jerk!"

"Sora you said they were innocent!" Riku said try to hold me back from hitting them.

"Oh yeah! Let's go Riku!"

"Sora, how do you know they are innocent?

"Well they were gone when that certain person gave me the poisoned cream"

"How do you know that?"

"Vani's mom told me."

*Blink* *blink* *blink* "You actually used your brain Sora."

"I have a brain?!"

*sigh* "We are now back to dumb Sora."

"YIPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

"Let's just go."

"SURE!" he dragged me away from his house. I wonder what those two are doing?"

"Soooooo… what now?" I asked Riku.

"Well… since it wasn't Vanitas or Sam, I guess it kind of means it was either me or my mom."

"Don't worry Riku, I know it wasn't you."

"I know that, I'm just worried that maybe it was my mom who did it."

"Why?"

"Well, have you read the law? You can't just go poisoning people's faces."

"REALLY?"

*face palm*

"Riku, I want a pony!"

"Can we focus on the problem at hand?"

*blink* *blink* *blink* *blink*

"You didn't understand what I just said, did you?"

"NOPE!"

-after minutes of walking around aimlessly-

"Let's go back to my house!"

"WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"

"I'll take that as a yes."

We went back to Riku's house.

"Hey Riku, where's your mom?" I asked him.

"She went to get something. Why do you wanna know?"

"Well, I had this CRAZY idea."

"Which is?"

"LET"S SNOOP THROUGH YOUR MOM"S STUFF!" I told him cheerfully.

"NO!"

"AAAAAAAWWWWWW! Why not?" I whined.

"Because she'll kill me if she saw me doing that!"

"…"

"Besides, the door to her room is always locked."

"Can't we at least try?"

"Fine, but only for five minutes."

"YAY! Thanks!"

We went upstairs pass Sam's room and towards the end of the corridor. YAY! Riku's mom's room wasn't locked. We went inside.

"Your mom's room is…" *footsteps* Riku clapped his hand over my mouth. What was that?


	6. A Little Akward

**OH MY GOSH! Who could have made those footsteps? Want me to tell. **

**YOU DO! The one who made those footsteps were *dramatic drum roll***

**HAH! I won't tell you. Read this chapter to find out.**

* * *

Riku clapped his hand over my mouth. I heard footsteps outside the door.

"Hide!" Riku said in a whisper. Riku hid inside a box and I hid under his mom's bed. We heard muffled voices outside. *crash* somebody slammed against the door. We heard soft moans outside. *blink* *blink* *blink*

"What was that?" I said barely above a whisper. Riku just shrugged. We got out of our hiding places and started to look around.

"I can't help but wonder, but… what's going on outside?"

"Beats me." replied Riku. Riku walked towards a long table. I followed him. On top of the table was some pieces of paper, some old photos, ball pens scattered around, trash and ,due to the mess, ants all over the place.

"Check the drawers, Sora." I nodded. In the first drawer I found… uhh… what's it called again… oh yeah! All those pink frilly girly stuff that girls wear. Also there was make up and that cream Riku gave me… or not Riku. At the bottom of the pile I saw the solution to all our problems… The Antidote.

"Riku, I found it!" I whispered.

"Good, let's go." We tried opening the door but something was blocking it. We pushed harder but it wouldn't budge. Finally after I ran towards the door, hitting it with my head, it opened. On the ground were Sam and Vanitas snogging. They turned towards our direction but didn't seem to care that we were here and continued making out. This continued for half an hour. It would have took longer but Riku's mom finally arrived.

"Bye Sam." Said Vanitas.

"Bye." *giggles*

"Uhhhhhhh…" I just stood there saying uhhh stupidly.

"Sora you should go. It's getting late, I'll… um… see you tomorrow then."

"OKAY!"

"SHUT UP SORA!" yelled Sam.

"YIPEEEEEEEEE!" I started skipping around. Riku's mom stared daggers at me, but I just kept skipping and yelling 'yipeeeeeeeeee!' Finally Riku shoved me out the door and I was alone… outside… on the street… I started to get scared and started crying. I walked home and sat on our porch staring at myself (the sky. For those people who don't know, Sora means sky) I picked up a math book that my brother left on the porch. Since I couldn't read, I just ripped out the pages and threw the pages in the vast unknown, in other words, the trash can. Roxas came outside, probably to retrieve his math book. His eyes widened when he saw what I was doing. What's wrong with his eyes they are now HUGE? It was normal a while ago. Roxas glared at me. He clenched his fists. He stomped towards me. Then I blacked out.

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**Stupid, right? Sorry about that. I have writers block and just forced my self to write this. Are you people okay with really short chapters? Well if you're not, sorry about that too. I promise to make the next chapter better. Review please. It will help this story become better. Criticism is allowed. Thanks for reading. By the way I wanted to thank Sex and Vex for her very amusing review so I decided to add way more cursing and screaming in the next chapter.**


	7. SEX!

Everything from last night was a blur. I woke up my head throbbing, and on my bed. Roxas was right across the room, glaring at me like there was no tomorrow.

"Good you're awake." He closed the door of my room and locked it. He turned around still looking pretty pissed of.

"Sora, we need to talk." He said through clenched teeth.

"What?" I asked still a little sleepy.

"SORA YOU FUCKING IDIOT! WHY DO YOU HAVE TO MAKE MY LIFE SO MISERABLE YOU STUPID ASS HAT!? I WILL FUCKING MURDER YOU! I WISH YOU"D JUST FUCKING DROP DEAD! YOU STUPID BITCH! HOW MANY MORE TIMES DO I HAVE TO FUCKING YELL AT YOU TO GET THROUGH YOUR FUCKING HEAD YOU MOTHER FUCKER!" he yelled at me. I cowered in fear behind my blanket. I stated weeping in fear.

"What did I do?" I asked.

"GOD, YOU'RE STUPID! YOU HAVE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME!" I just stared at him in confusion and fear.

"Roxa-"

"OH JUST SHUT UP YOU USELESS PILE OF SHIT! YOU ARE A MOTHERFUCKING ASS HOLE!" and with those kind words he left. Not knowing what I did wrong was very tiring so I went back to sleep.

I opened my eyes slowly finding Demyx on my bed looking at me with a smirk on his face.

"HEY DEMYX! WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE!?" I yelled, not the least bit creeped out that he is on my bed watching me when I was asleep.

"Sora get dressed. We're going to a gay bar." He said the smirk never leaving his face.

"WE!?" then I noticed Riku. He was giving Demyx those God-if-looks-could-kill-you'd-be-so-dead-right-now -looks.

"What's wrong Riku?"

"Hurry up Sora. We can't wait for you forever." interrupted Demyx.

"OK DEMYX!" I yelled. After a few minutes filled with an awkward silence just staring at each other Demyx started to get impatient.

"Sora."

"Yes?"

"Get dressed."

"…"

"Or do I have to dress you up for you." Demyx said a huge smirk on his face.

"SURE!" I yelled the obnoxious way I always do. A huge blush was very evident on Riku's face when I said that.

~**TIME SKIP~**

"Come on Riku! Don't be nervous! Let's go!" Demyx said trying to convince Riku to come inside the gay bar.

"N-NO! I'm staying here!"

"Awwww! Riku it'll be fun!" I exclaimed.

"I have a reputation to keep you know!"

"Who cares about that? Fun is WAY more important!"

"I care about my reputation!"

"Riku, just get in the gay bar or else." threatened Demyx.

"Or else what?"

"You run around the school naked."

"F-fine I'll go inside the stupid gay bar."

"YAY!" exclaimed the little ball of sunshine known as Sora.

**after about 5-10 glasses of a certain alcoholic beverage~**

**( third person's POV)**

The bartender asked them to leave seeing how drunk they were, Sora and Riku mostly.

They stayed at some cheap motel. Sora and Riku passed out. With nothing to do, Demyx left the building.

After a 30 minutes Demyx came back, camera in his hand. Hoping to find some yaoi going on inside the room he went inside as quietly as he could so he wouldn't disturb the two. Inside he found the two having 'fun'. He turned on his camera and just watched his beautiful entertainment.

Riku moaned. Sora was pounding into him.

"Ah! There! Harder! Harder!"

"Riku you're so tight!"

Sora was kissing Riku's collar bone, earning a moan from Riku. Riku's moans were like drugs to Sora. They were so addicting to Sora. Sora started to play with Riku's cock. Both were a panting and sweating mess.

"I'm gonna cum!" yelled Sora.

"Me too"

At this point they drew in closer, their pleasured expressions mirroring each other until Riku moaned at climax. Sora couldn't hold back and came too. They fell asleep in each other arms.

"That was awesome." exclaimed Demyx. He left the two thinking about how awesome Sora is when drunk.

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**Oh my gosh! I haven't updated in forever! I'm so sorry. I hope this chapter will help you forgive me. Please don't hate me! I'll update in 2 weeks or something I guess. Again I am sorry for the late update. Writer's block is a bitch.**


	8. Randomness!

**Thanks for all those viewers who read this shit. To the story!** **BTW this story will continue with a third person's POV unless I change it or something. I just realized that was a very short sex scene. Ah well, I'll try to make in longer or something.**

* * *

Sora and Riku woke up in each other's arms. Riku rubbed his eyes heavy from sleep.

When his eyes finally adjusted in the dark room he realized he and Sora were on the floor. What surprised him though was they were both naked. He tried to stand up, but found out he couldn't. The lower part of his body was hurting, that's when he realized what happened last night. His face showed two expressions, shock and fear. I'm not a virgin anymore he thought. Plus his virginity was taken away by Sora. Sora!

"Riku…" interrupted Riku's thoughts.

"What?"

"What happened?"

"Stuff." After that Riku put on his clothes and left the building without another word. Sora was left there confused and staring at the door. After a few minutes he decided to follow. He opened the door then realized he still wasn't wearing any clothes. He closed the door and walked towards his discarded clothes on the floor and put on, but failed many times, his clothes. He quickly left the room looking for Riku. He endeed up searching for him in his backyard.

that he is still in his own backyard) he failed and collapsed on the floor exhausted. He stared at the sky in deep thought, or as deep as Sora's thoughts can be. Slowly Sora drifted off in dream land.

"Sora! GET YOUR ASS INSIDE NOW YOU IDIOT!" Roxas yelled.

"I'm coming!" Sora replied, a goofy smile on his face completely forgetting what happened earlier. AND A BUNCH OF HOBOS WERE IN SORA'S HOUSE NAKED AND ATTACKED HIM WITH RAINBOW COLORED STUFFED MONKEYS.

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**Random ending is random. I still have writer's block so this was the best I could come up with. Stay tuned for the next chapter!**


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